It’s a tale almost as old as time: Boy meets girl. Boy and girl fall head over heels for each other, and the “honeymoon phase”, as its often dubbed, begins. During this initial phase food tastes sweeter, the air seems fresher, and the fires of passion burn uncontrollably. You become this weirdo that laughs at jokes that aren’t funny and walks around like you have just woken up from a 2 year slumber. Yes, we have all been there before and wish, at some stage, that feeling could last forever. Unfortunately, more often than not those flames burn out, with time, leaving nothing behind but smoldering cinders and one question. Where did I go wrong?

Has your relationship reached this point of the story? If you answered yes, don’t worry, you share your answer with 72% of Australian women in steady relationships; But like every problem there is always a solution. You don’t have to do what most people do, and accept that once the passion is gone it will never return. There are certain measures that can be taken to ensure a happy ending.

Truth be told, regardless of how strong the chemistry in a relationship appears to be, at some point or another couples usually hit the proverbial brick wall in their love life. There are a number of factors that contribute to this problem primarily being:

• stress from work,
• money worries
• repetitious or monotonous lovemaking,
• accumulated anger or resentment from previous fights
• television in the bedroom
• and/or lack of time.

The mistake that most people make is to submit to these demons; which is what they are. They are the enemy! The difference between a dying love and a blossoming romance is the action that is taken to fend off what most regard as the inevitable. Well I’ve got news for all of you. It does not have to be this way. My wife Samantha and I are living proof of that.

The first thing that you need to realize is that it is not a long and difficult journey to achieving a great love life. There are two very simple solutions. Laughter and change.

I have been asked this question a thousand times and I never get tired of answering it. “How do I spice up my love life and really get his heart pumping?” The first thing that always comes out of my mouth is “start with sexy costumes!”, or as I refer to them as, “love lifesavers”. It might seem like a simple answer, but you would be shocked at how many couples aren’t doing it yet. Even a relatively modest costume can create massive change to your romantic life. Just remember that there is a very fine line between ordinary and extraordinary.

If you have never engaged in intimate role-play or used props in lovemaking before, getting started can prove a bit intimidating and even awkward. The key to overcoming this fear is to release your inhibitions and open up to the idea of exploring your deepest fantasies. Should you feel uncomfortable? Of course not! It’s healthy, perfectly normal, and most importantly, a whole lot of fun to let your imagination run wild.

When you decide that the time is right to introduce sexy costumes into your lovemaking repertoire, the following tips will undoubtedly help you make the most of the new experience:

• Communicate – Whether it is your fantasy or his, you will both feel much more comfortable if you have talked about it beforehand. If you have always wanted to be a policewoman arresting a criminal, suggest it to him. Yes, there may be LAUGHTER at first, but isn’t that what we are trying to accomplish here anyway? If he has a secret desire to make love to a nurse, and trust me most men do, doctor his needs and watch the once fizzling romance come to life again.
• Start Small – Some find it difficult to step out in front of their partner for the first time in full costume, so introduce small props or partial costumes to begin with. Ease into it. Try using the policewoman’s hat before you hit him with the handcuffs; or wrap a stethoscope around your neck to give him a preview of the main event. Work your way up to full costume and watch his temperature rise in the process.
• Change places – This can be as simple as moving from the bedroom to the living room. According to a Sydney survey a shocking 89% of the participants claimed to have made love outside the bedroom and enjoyed it more. This is not because they were just in the mood that day. It’s because it’s exciting, it’s fun, it’s sometimes scary, and most importantly, it’s A CHANGE! All these factors increase your heart rate and adrenalin levels causing heightened sensations during lovemaking. When you are role-playing try to move to various rooms of the house if it is possible. It will increase the electricity tenfold.
• Don’t overdo it – Like everyday lovemaking, playing the same role over and over again can get boring. My recommendation is to role play 25% of the time and be yourself for the other 75% of the time, hence if you are making love 4 times a fortnight, you should use a costume once a fortnight. It will keep both aspects of your love life fresh. Don’t be afraid to try new costumes too. You will find fantasies you never even knew you had. I promise.

When it is time to put a little pizzazz back into the bedroom,sexy costumes can make all the difference in the world. I tell thousands every year that a happy ending to their story is only a few costumes away. Act out your fantasies, reconnect with your partner, and turn smoldering cinders back into burning flames.